How Tesla Probably Cut the Model 3's Price to $45,000
Tesla slashed its cars' prices without further elaboration. Allow us to elaborate.
We were surprised to learn that Tesla is slashing prices in response to reduced demand for its electric cars. The cheapest Model 3 now lists for $45,380, which qualifies it for the $7,500 Federal tax credit , bringing the out-the-door price to under forty grand. It's not quite the mythical $25,000 Tesla, or even the stillborn $35,000 Tesla, but it draws the 3 closer to its original pricing of around $40,000 before incentives. The 2023 Model Y SUV also qualifies for the new EV credit, its price having dropped a whopping 13 grand to $54,380.
How did Tesla manage to reduce the cost of a Model 3 so dramatically? We have some ideas—you know, beyond Tesla having previously sold the 3 for this little, meaning it just un-did earlier increases—and so it is, with apologies to Worldwide Pants (and fervent hopes they won't send us a cease-and-desist letter), that we present...
The Top Ten Ways Tesla Cut the Model 3's Price to $45,000
10. Buyers must agree to spend four hours per day driving for Uber on Elon Musk's account.
9. Tesla Vision cameras replaced by Tesla Vision seeing eye dogs.
8. Wood-fired seat heaters.
7. Center display now only shows Elon Musk's Twitter feed; stepping on accelerator automatically likes and retweets his posts.
6. Instead of a Supercharger subscription, buyers get a portable exercise bicycle connected to a generator.
5. Tesla Model 3 list price now indexed to Tesla stock price.
4. Headlights, wipers and brakes work on a pay-per-use basis.
3. Front drive motor replaced by front pedals.
2. Button to turn off Full Self Driving feature is now a $15,000 option.
And the #1 way Tesla was able to cut the Model 3's price to $45,000...
1. *Batteries not included